


Trial and Error

by martianwahtney



Series: You Have to Be Shitting Me [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Getting Together, Harley has two irondads who love each other even if they don't realize it, M/M, Manipulative Nick Fury, Nick Fury Knows All, Parent Tony Stark, Protective James "Rhodey" Rhodes, Protective Tony Stark, Tony Stark Has A Heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-25
Updated: 2019-12-20
Packaged: 2020-03-17 09:03:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18962116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/martianwahtney/pseuds/martianwahtney
Summary: Rhodes and Harley watched Fury step into the elevator. Tony stood there for a moment, his back to them before he turned and pointed directly to Harley.“Youliedto me,”“Only a little!”“Do you even have a sister?”“Ok maybe I lied about that too,” Harley admitted.“Unbelievable,”“I did tell you we’re connected,” Harley pointed out.--Where Tony Stark tries to figure out how to be a dad, how tonotbe in love with his best friend, and what to do when his kid figures it all out.Ironhusbands Bingo fill: O3- Harley Keener





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter 1: ironhusbands bingo o3 Harley Keener  
> chapter 2: tony stark bingo r5 Harley Keener  
> chapter 3: ironhusbands bingo g1 The Bots  
> chapter 4: tony stark bingo k2 WTF  
> chapter 5: ironhusbands bingo b1 Home

“Take us to Stark please,” Fury said when they stepped into the elevator.  
  
“Very well,”  
  
“Hi J,” Harley said quietly.  
  
“ _Hello Mr. Keener_ ,” JARVIS greeted warmly.  
  
“Do you know?”  
  
“ _I have just finished accessing the files_ ,” JARVIS said, Harley didn’t think he was imagining the displeasure in the AI’s voice.  
  
Fury sighed deeply, obviously not happy with that answer.  
  
“Do you think he’s going to be disappointed?”  
  
“ _Yes, but not for the reasons you think. The Sir has already sent you a thank you gift and you are not at your home to receive it_ ,” JARVIS told him.  
  
Harley smiled softly.  
  
“What did he make me?”  
  
“ _It’s a surprise Young Sir_ ,”  
  
The formality surprised him, never in his life did he think a creation like JARVIS would address him as Young Sir. Harley couldn’t help but wonder if the real Jarvis had called Tony that.  
  
The elevator opened with a ding and Harley and Fury stepped out.  
  
“Hey-ey! It’s you! What are you doing here?”  
  
Tony then saw Fury and the smile instantly slipped from his face.  
  
“Oh no,”  
  
“I think we need to have a talk,” Fury said.  
  
“You are just… the worst,”  
  
Harley grinned. He had definitely inherited his father’s personality. Which- absolutely wild to think he had inherited anything from Tony Stark.  
  
“Rhodey! Come keep Keener company while Fury makes me listen to things!” Tony called.  
  
A dark skinned man stepped into the room looking vaguely confused. The Iron Patriot pilot. Or was he back to War Machine now?  
  
Fury and Tony stepped into a different room.  
  
“What’s that about?” Rhodes asked.  
  
“Me,”  
  
Rhodes shot him an incredulous look.  
  
“You?”  
  
Harley gave a short nod. He drummed his fingers against his leg, trying to figure out how to ask the next question.  
  
“Hey did one of Tony’s parents have blonde hair or blueish eyes?”  
  
“His mom did,” Rhodes said.  
  
And that was where Harley got his looks from, Maria Stark. Which as also absolutely insane to think about, inheriting his features from Maria Stark.  
  
“Any reason you need that information?” Rhodes asked curiously.  
  
“Well I always wondered where the blonde and blue came from and I guess I know,” Harley said, aiming for nonchalance and missing by a mile.  
  
Rhodes stared at him.  
  
“I’m sorry what?”  
  
“Well I’m kinda- Well I guess I’m Tony’s kid or something,”  
  
“You’re-“  
  
They were interrupted by Tony storming out of the adjacent room.  
  
“And while you’re leaving please take up my suggestion to Go Fuck Yourself. My fucking AI is in your system because you pull shit like this. Thirteen years he’s been alive and god knows how long you’ve kept this from me. You show up at my Tower again and I’ll repulsor your ass through a wall,”  
  
Rhodes and Harley watched Fury step into the elevator. Tony stood there for a moment, his back to them before he turned and pointed directly to Harley.  
  
“You _lied_ to me,”  
  
“Only a little!”  
  
“Do you even have a sister?”  
  
“Ok maybe I lied about that too,” Harley admitted.  
  
“Unbelievable,”  
  
“I did tell you we’re connected,” Harley pointed out.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley and Tony adjust to each other, Rhodes is soft
> 
> chpt 2: TSB R5- Harley Keener

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yesssssssssssss,,,,,,,,,, i have returned to finish this fic

Harley sat down on his new bed. His new bed in his new room in his new home. Tony Stark was his dad.  
  
“Shit,” he said eloquently.  
  
He hadn’t really been prepared for Tony’s welcome- or he hadn’t expected Tony to be so calm. He had shown Harley to his new room, told him he could order anything he want, decorated it how he pleased, and then Tony said he was going to grab some gadgets for Harley. JARVIS said that meant Tony was getting a StarkPhone, StarkTablet, and a StarkLaptop all ready to give to him.  
  
He flopped down on his bed and stared up at the white ceiling, trying to figure out ways he could decorate his new room.

  
  


Tony sat at the workbench and started to set up a phone, tablet, and laptop for Harley. He knew he could let JARVIS do it, but he needed to do something to keep himself calm.  
  
“So you just… have a kid now?” Rhodes asked as he stepped into the lab.  
  
“Technically I’ve always had a kid, just… didn’t know it,” Tony muttered, rubbing the bridge of his nose.  
  
“God I thought she was joking,” he whispered.  
  
“Who?”  
  
“Maya,”  
  
“She showed up at my house and I asked her if there was a 12 year old in the front seat of her car and she said ‘he’s 13’ and I didn’t even realize,” he dropped his head on the workbench.  
  
“He’s 13,” Tony said dramatically.  
  
“I’m already a worse father than Howard-”  
  
“I’m gonna stop you right there Tones,” Rhodes said kindly but albeit forcefully.  
  
“You have been a dad since we met-”  
  
“I wasn’t a dad when we met,” Tony protested.  
  
Rhodes gestured wildly to Dum-E. Tony didn’t even try to deny that one, Dum-E always was his most unruly kid.  
  
“Honey pot… he’s a human being ok? If I accidently fuck up Dum-E I can fix him no problem. I don’t- I can’t-” Tony cut off sharply, fingers rubbing at his chest, where the arc reactor used to sit.  
  
Rhodes placed his arm on Tony’s shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Tony leaned into his touch, his eyes shut tightly.  
  
“You got me, Tones,” Rhodey said quietly.  
  
Tony blinked a few times, smiling at Rhodey. He looked to be on the verge of saying something but a beep interrupted them.  
  
“The devices are ready for the young Sir,” JARVIS told them.  
  
“I’m going to order take out, ask the kid what he wants,” Rhodey said as he pushed himself to his feet.  
  
“Sure thing honey pot,”  
  
Tony gathered up the phone, tablet, and laptop- and their chargers- and brought it up to Harley’s room. He really hoped that Harley would feel comfortable enough to change the room to his liking.  
  
He knocked on the door gently and waited for an answer.  
  
“Come in,”  
  
Tony stepped in, arms ladened with gifts and stood there awkwardly for a moment before he set them on Harley’s bed.  
  
“Thanks,” Harley said quietly.  
  
“Rhodey’s ordering take out, probably Chinese, want anything?”  
  
“Kung Pao Chicken,”  
  
“J, tell Rhodes to get a double order,”  
  
“ _Yes, Sir_ ,”  
  
For a few seconds they were silent.  
  
“Well… I’ll let you get settled then,” Tony said at last.  
  
Harley just nodded. He watched Tony walk away and clenched his fist.  
  
“Hey… Tony?”  
  
He paused at the doorway and turned.  
  
“Yea?”  
  
“Thank you,”  
  
“Sure thing kid,”  
  
Harley smiled softly. It would be weird, definitely, but he and Tony had a good connection.  
  
“Maya Hansen was your mom, huh?” Tony asked quietly as he hovered in the doorway.  
  
“Yea,”  
  
“Did they tell you what happened?”  
  
“Just a work accident,” Harley said.  
  
“Your mom ran a privately funded think tank that created Extremis, it’s an advanced form of genetic manipulation that allows someone to regenerate after injuries,” Tony said quickly.  
  
Harley sat up.  
  
“It started pure, as only science can, but along the way it got corrupted by Aldrich Killian, her boss. He used it to create his own little army-”  
  
“My mom worked for the Mandarin?” Harley asked quietly.  
  
“She tried like hell to stop him, and she paid for it,”  
  
“If it’s any consolation, Pepper totally blew him up,” he added.  
  
“Not you?” Harley asked.  
  
“Oh god no. He would have kicked my ass. Even with the suits I’m no match for the exothermic abilities of Extremis, Pepper, however, beautiful glowy Pepper, she kicked ass,” Tony said.  
  
“She’s got Extremis?”  
  
Tony nodded.  
  
“She asked me to stabilize it for her,” he said.  
  
“That’s so badass,”  
  
Tony laughed.  
  
“You have no idea kid. Now c’mon. Our food should be here soon and you should be properly introduced to my honey pot,”  
  
“Iron Patriot,”  
  
Tony blinked a few times, clearly offended by Harley calling Rhodes by the wrong name.  
  
“To think I’m doomed to a life of sassy kids,”  
  
“ _A true pity, Sir_ ,” JARVIS drawled much to Harley’s amusement.  
  
Tony waved off his AI and nodded to Harley. Harley pushed himself off his bed and followed Tony- his dad?- out to the communal floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i forgot i planned on crossposting this with the TSB and round two ends in a month so i better get a move on it


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harley meets the bots
> 
> ironhusbands bingo: G1 the Bots

“Oh my god! It’s Iron Patriot,”  
  
“C’mon kid you’re breaking my heart,” Rhodes said as he placed the cartons of takeout on the counter.  
  
“You weren’t behind the name change?” Harley asked, peering inside one of the containers.  
  
Both Tony and Rhodes scoffed.  
  
“Iron Patriot tested well with focus groups. War Machine was too-”  
  
“Badass,” Tony muttered.  
  
Rhodes smiled softly, gazing at Tony with _soft_ eyes. Harley narrowed his eyes slightly, that wasn’t your average ‘my friend is so funny’ look, that was a ‘I’m in love with a dumbass who thinks he’s funny’ look. Harley was going to have a lot of fun if he was right about the look.  
  
They piled their plates up with take out and Harley followed the two men through the dining room and into a living room.  
  
“Do the other Avengers stop by?” Harley asked.  
  
“Bruce does, sometimes Clint, and Steve will show up if Natasha drags him,” Tony said with a shrug.  
  
“ _I believe, Sir, Dr. Banner is on his way here_ ,” JARVIS interrupted.  
  
Tony grinned at that.  
  
“So cool,” Harley whispered.  
  
Tony turned on some show on the tv and they lapsed into silence as they ate their dinner. The silence was occasionally broken up by Tony and Rhodey bantering about something on the tv.  
  
“Tones! Go get your own! Stop stealing off my damn plate,”  
  
“But platypus the kitchen is so far away!” Tony whined, trying (and failing) to stab at something on Rhodey’s plate.  
  
“So?”  
  
“So! Why would I go all the way to the kitchen when I can just have some of yours?” he asked.  
  
Rhodes laughed, Tony abandoned his mission for half a second to watch Rhodes as he laughed. Harley struggled against saying anything. His father, Tony Stark aka Iron Man, aka the second biggest badass in the world was hopelessly pining for James Rhodes aka Iron Patriot (War Machine) aka the biggest badass in the world.  
  
“What’s with the smirk?” Tony asked.  
  
“Nothing,” Harley said quickly.  
  
Tony fixed him with a suspicious glance but didn’t press any further. Harley hoped that Dr. Banner had noticed the same thing, so at least he wouldn’t have to deal with the pining glances on his own.  
  
The show they were watching on the tv came to an end and a news report on the Mandarin started up, Rhodey was quick to change the channel to something else.  
  
“Hey Tony?” Harley asked, reminded of something Tony had said to him in his garage.  
  
“Yea?”  
  
“Did you fix the bots?” Harley asked.  
  
Tony brightened.  
  
“Sure did. I fished them out of the ocean and got all three of them working again,” he said proudly.  
  
“Can I meet them?” Harley asked excitedly.  
  
“Sure,”  
  
Harley followed them to Tony’s workshop where three bots were wheeling around.  
  
“These… are my other kids,” Tony introduced, gesturing to the three bots.  
  
Harley stared at them, a grin taking over his face.  
  
“Dum-E, U, and Butterfingers,”  
  
The bots zoomed over to him, swiveling their cameras at him like they were puppies examining a new toy.  
  
“They’re amazing!” Harley said.  
  
He felt Tony lay a hand on his shoulder.  
  
“This is Harley, he’s your little brother so be nice to him,” Tony said to the three bots.  
  
“Little?” Harley asked.  
  
“I made Dum-E in my MIT years, and U and Butterfingers happened before the year 2000 so… yes. Little brother,”  
  
Harley grinned again. Dum-E latched onto his sleeve and let out a string of excited sounding beeps.  
  
“ _Dum-E would like to know if he’s… metal too_ ,” JARVIS announced.  
  
Harley laughed as Tony sighed.  
  
“No, Dum-E. He’s human like your dear old dad,”  
  
Dum-E beeped again, sounding just as happy and excited as before.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> where Harley puts his foot down and forces a confession

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the square is WTF so that can be What the Fuck or Why The Face

“Thanks Happy!” Harley said as he pulled Harley’s suitcase out of the trunk.  
  
Happy gave a short nod, but Harley could see the tiny smile on his face. It was true that Happy was supposed to be the (for)Head of Security for SI but he still found time to take Harley to MIT for Science Camp, and then back to the Tower at the end of the summer.  
  
Harley had spent the past two months at his dad’s old alma mater to do science things with a bunch of other science geeks. He’d met a few new friends including Peter Parker and Ned Leeds who lived in Queens. He had had a great time, but he was extremely excited to be back at the tower with his dad, Rhodes, and Bruce Banner. He was really hoping his dad and Rhodes got their heads out of their assess and talked about their feelings.  
  
Harley headed up the elevator to the communal floor. The past seven months had been… a lot. He’d lost his mother, moved to a new state, gained a father (Tony), a second father (Rhodes), a very intense (for)Head of Security, a very scary AI, and an even scarier aunt (Pepper). Plus Bruce was really cool. He was adjusting.  
  
The doors opened and Harley was instantly greeted by the sight of his father with a massive smile on his face.  
  
“Harley!”  
  
Tony pulled him into a hug before he was all the way out of the elevator. Harley grinned and hugged his dad back.  
  
“How was MIT?”  
  
“So cool,” Harley said as Tony took his bag from him.  
  
“That’s where I met my honeybear you know,”  
  
“Wow so that’s… 30 years of you pining for him then?” Harley asked.  
  
Tony seemed to choke on air, his face twisting like he’d just bitten into a lemon.  
  
“I don’t- _Rhodes_? I mean- no- how do you-?”  
  
“Oh now who’s the lying liar who lies?” Harley shot back.  
  
Tony looked like he’d been suckerpunched.  
  
“I have… no idea what you’re talking about,” Tony said at last.  
  
“Right,”  
  
Tony shook his head and led Harley to the living room where Rhodey and Bruce where, Harley’s favorite foods were on the coffee table and Harley knew that JARVIS had queued up some frankly ridiculous movies for the four of them to watch.  
  
“Harley!”  
  
Rhodes and Bruce greeted him with a hug.  
  
“How was camp? Tones and I met at MIT you know,”  
  
“Dad told me,” Harley said with a nod.  
  
“It was awesome! I got partnered up with a kid named Peter Parker- I think you’d like him- we built robots and built computers it was totally cool,” Harley said excitedly.  
  
“You could be a legacy,” Tony threw out.  
  
“I’m 13,”  
  
Tony ruffled Harley’s hair affectionately.  
  
“I didn’t say now! Just stating that he could be a legacy,”  
  
“What if I want to go somewhere better?” Harley asked with a smirk as he snagged a burger off the coffee table.  
  
Tony and Rhodes looked offended, Bruce was trying very hard to hide a smirk. Harley innocently took a bite of his burger.  
  
“The insolence,” Rhodes muttered, hand over his heart like he was an old Victorian woman who had just seen her granddaughter flash her ankles to a man who wasn’t her betrothed.  
  
“Can we watch movies now?” Harley asked.  
  
Bruce clapped Tony on the back.  
  
“He’s a great kid,”  
  
They were quick to settle down on the couch with plates full of food, JARVIS pulled up the first movie and it was all jokes from there.  
  
“What the fuck,” Harley said quietly, watching Tony and Rhodey’s flirt.  
  
“What was that?” Tony asked a little sharply.  
  
“Why the face?” Harley blurted, beyond surprised that his father had caught his little slip.  
  
Tony narrowed his eyes slightly but nodded. Harley relaxed and continued to watch the two grown ass adults flirt. It was so tiring.  
  
“Why the face,” Bruce agreed solemnly.  
  
The days started to blur together, between his father and Rhodes flirting, movie nights, sciencing with Tony and Bruce, texting with Peter, and plotting to get his father and Rhodes together, Harley had a lot on his plate. Besides, school was starting soon, he had to get them together before he had to do homework. He didn’t want to worry about homework _and_ his two idiot fathers.  
  
Harley dropped his head to the table, a heavy sigh escaping him.  
  
“Why the face?” Bruce asked softly, amusement clear in his voice.  
  
“Why the face,” Harley agreed.  
  
Bruce patted his shoulder gently. Harley was getting so tired of the pining. Not even letting his dad know that Harley _knew_ had helped anything. Tony and Rhodey were still as hopeless as ever.  
  
“What are we going to do?”  
  
“What if we trap them in an elevator, J, can we do that?”  
  
“ _I would advise against it, young Sir_ ,” JARVIS replied. Harley groaned at the response.  
  
“What if I get dad to talk about his feelings for Rhodes, and you make sure Rhodes is there to listen?” Harley asked.  
  
“Seems way too simple,” Bruce said.  
  
“If we can’t outsmart them, then we just... out dumb them,”  
  
Bruce stared at him for a moment.  
  
“Brilliant,”  
  
“I can’t believe you’re ok with this,”  
  
“Tony was the first person who wasn’t afraid of the Hulk. He treated me like he would have treated anyone else. Plus it’s tiring to see them pine like this,” Bruce said.  
  
In the end it was much easier done than either of them anticipated, all Harley had to do was talk to his father, and all Bruce had to do was get Rhodes in the same vicinity. Not that hard at all.  
  
“So when are you going to tell Rhodes?” Harley asked casually, his eyes still on his phone where Bruce’s ‘ _Operation: Why The Face is a go_ ’ text was glaring at him.  
  
“Tell Rhodes what?” Tony asked, rooting around in the fridge for something.  
  
“That you like him,”  
  
Tony soffed.  
  
“Of course I like him,”  
  
“That you _like_ like him,” Harley countered.  
  
Tony froze and turned to face his kid, a stalk of broccoli in his hand.  
  
“I don’t _like_ like him,”  
  
“Right, sorry, you looooove him,” Harley teased.  
  
Tony pinched the bridge of his nose.  
  
“Kid you’re killing me,”  
  
“You can’t lie to me old man, we’re-”  
  
“So help me god you finish that,”  
  
Harley grinned.  
  
“What do you want me to do here kid? He’s been my best friend for 30 years. You want me to just go up to him and say ‘platypus I’ve been in love with you since MIT’? I don’t think so,” Tony said, waving the broccoli around as if it was supposed to prove his point.  
  
“You what?” Rhodes asked as he rounded the corner into the kitchen.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and Rhodey work some things out, Harley is... smug

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ironhusbands bingo fill: b1 Home

Tony locked eyes with Harley, a panicked expression settled over his face, the broccoli still in his hand.

“Oh my good god look at the time,” Harley announced, glancing down at his bare wrist.

“I have to go!”

He slipped out of the kitchen, pointedly ignoring the the look his father shot him. He found Bruce in his lab, he was very obviously pretending to be busy.

“I think Tony might actually ground me for this,” Harley said.

Bruce’s head shot up.

“What?”

“He looked so panicked,”

“So he’s going to ground you?”

“For till… college,”

“Do you really think he’s going to ground you or did you want an excuse to quote iCarly?” Bruce asked.

“Well that’s neither here nor there,” Harley said.

Bruce rolled his eyes.

“So are we just going to hide here until JARVIS gives us the all clear?”

“Yes,”

Harley had no idea how long he and Bruce hid out in Bruce’s lab before Tony found them.

“Soooo?” Harley asked.

“I hardly see how it’s any of your business,” Tony said.

“Tony!” he whined.

“Maybe you shouldn’t have meddled,” Tony snapped back.

“If I hadn’t meddled then you wouldn’t have a boyfriend,”

Tony actually flushed.

“Oh my god you guys actually-”

“Tony?” Bruce pressed softly.

“Ok so maybe we’re dating now,” Tony admitted.

“Operation: Why The Face is a success!” Harley held his hand out and Bruce hi-fived him.

“So you were in on it?” Tony demanded.

“No,” Bruce said, a blatant lie.

“This is unbelievable,” Tony muttered.

“The betrayal! In my own home!”

“ _ Sir, Colonel Rhodes asked me to remind you that dinner is waiting _ ,” JARVIS said.

“Oh sweet, I’m starved,”

“You’re unbelievable,” Tony muttered.

“Thank you,” Harley said sincerely.

Tony pinched the bridge of his nose.

Before Harley knew it, it was time for school to start up again, and then it was Christmas time. He had spent those four-ish months doing his schoolwork, his homework, talking with Peter and Ned, and teasing Tony and Rhodey about how long they had been pining for each other. It was a good life.

Harley sat down on the floor in the communal living room. The Christmas tree in front of him was bigger than Iron Man and War Machine put together, and by rough estimates, there were about 200 presents under the tree.

Tony was dressed in an absolutely hideous Hulk sweater, he had a mug of coffee in his hands and was staring at Rhodes- who wore a heinous War Machine sweater- with undisguised affection. It was disgusting.

“Brucey! Happy holidays!” Tony cheered the second Bruce walked in.

Harley noted that Bruce was  _ not _ wearing a horrible Christmas sweater but instead a very nice deep red one. Bruce mumbled out a sleepy greeting before collapsing on the couch with a yawn.

“We’re all here which means I get to pass out presents!”

“Why are you so… awake?” Bruce asked.

“He didn’t sleep last night,” Rhodes said, exasperation in his voice but his face was all soft and in love.

Harley watched his father start to pass out presents while he bickered with Rhodes and Bruce. It was a far cry from a year ago, when he had found out about what happened to his mother- and god what a year it had been. Sure, Harley had been uncertain when he first arrived but Tony was the best and now Harley couldn’t imagine his life any other way. The Tower with Bruce, and Rhodes, and Tony, and JARVIS, and the bots felt like home. Harley glanced at his father again, Tony was sitting on the floor, laughing at the present he was holding. Home.


End file.
